DVD Conan the Destroyer
The dark, brooding tone of Conan the Barbarian is replaced in this rousing sequel by a lighter, more humorous tone and one of the campiest casts ever assembled. This time, Conan is assigned by a duplicitous queen (Sarah Douglas) to escort a virgin princess (Olivia d'Abo) on a treacherous trek to a crystal palace where they will retrieve a priceless gemstone. Basketball champ and self-described Lothario Wilt Chamberlain plays Bombaata, a warrior sent on a secret mission to kill Conan, and the androgynous Grace Jones plays Zula, a wild woman who becomes Conan's loyal ally. Some consider this sequel a disappointment, but the film makes no apologies for its silliness, and that's the key to its success as gloriously pulpy entertainment. --Jeff Shannon |
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Review(s): DVD Conan the Destroyer | |
| Not horrible but not great |
Call this more like 2 1/2 stars. This movie may actually be a bit closer in spirit to a true swords and sorcery epic than the first movie. We've got evil queens, evil wizards, monsters, etc...Unfortunately, Conan is even saddled with a bigger cast of companians. Mako is back as the wizard, Tracy Walter plays a thief for comic relief, then we have Oliva D'Abo as a Princess, and Wilt Chamberlain and Grace Jones rounding out the cast. This is some of the worst casting EVER! Jones, Chamberlain and Walter are totally out of place in this movie. Chamberlain is even more wooden than Arnold, Jones basically scowls and growls for 90 minutes and Walter sounds like a hillbilly in ancient times. The special effects are B movie at it's best. Poorly looking rubber costumes. Conan's nemesis from the books and comics, Thoth Amon comes off as totally pathetic. It's not all bad. Arnold himself holds things together as best he can and the action scenes are well done. Still, We have yet to see anyone do a REAL good swords and sorcery/fantasy movie(discounting Lord of the Rings, of course). King Kull with Kevin Sorbo was yet another slap in the face to fans of Robert E. Howard.
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Conan the Destroyer picks up where Conan the Barbarian left off at. We are once again with the hero Conan(Arnold Schwarzenegger) and he has a new quest. He is hired by a queen to take a virgin princess to a floating island to retreave a crystal. He is made to believe that the queen can bring back his love Valeria. In reality the queen wants to kill the princes and use the crystal to rule the world.Conan the Destroyer isn't at nearly as violent and bloody as the first. The first movie is a lot more barbaric. The sword play is slower and more brutal. You also don't see a whole lot of magic in the first film. Granted you see some, but not like you see in Destroyer. The sword play isn't nearly as bloody. It's more high paced and you see a bigger variety of weapons in the movie. You also see a diffrent kind of cast. Mako is the only returning member besides Conan to the movie. He continues his role as the wizard and once again is a comedic charm. Grace Jones as a role as Zulu warrior. She is excellent in the movie. I was surprised to see her in the movie. Wilt Chambelin is also in the movie. He plays a warrior that is suppose kill Conan once the crystal is retreaved. He is in great shape for a 50 something year old man. I was impressed. I liked Conan the Destroyer. It's PG and is something the whole family can watch. I don't think it's as good as Barbarian, but I do love it. It's a must for Arnold and fantasy fans. Get the DVD and enjoy.
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| Awful movie. I wish I could forget it |
The masterul epic quality of "Conan the Barbarian" demanded an epic sequel. Instead, what we were given was a parody.In the first movie Conan's character was well developed, you saw what happened to him over the course of his life, what created him, and what his motivations were. In this movie, Conan is reduced to a bodybuilder in a fur diaper. Conan's companions in the first movie were formidible accomplices who Conan respected. In this movie, Conan's companions, especially the annoyingly sniveling cretin Malak, (played by Tracey Walter) have no redeeming qualities at all. I kept hoping Conan would impale him and put us out of our misery. I was constantly lead to wonder "Why is Conan hanging around with this guy?" Sandahl Bergman in the original movie was a Valkyrie. She was amazingly beautiful, but powerful and dangerous. In the seocnd movie we were given Grace Jones. Please. Not only is she unattractive, her character was essentially unbelievable, crude and repulsive. The notion that she could be any kind of a warrior was laughable. The villains in the first movie are fearful. James Earl Jones as Thulsa Doom, Sven Ole Thorsen as Thorgrim and Ben Davidson as Rexor come across as men who could beat Conan. It made the outcome uncertain and Conan's eventual victory that much more powerful. In this movie the villain is a guy in a monster suit with poorly done special effects. It is so bad that Conan must drop his sword and arm wrestle the monster for a fair fight. Wilt Chamberlain, while a creditable athlete, did not have the screen prescence. One look at him and it was obvious that Conan could take him. He doesn't do the role justice. In the first movie, magic was just that. Magic. It was dangerous, expensive in terms of life and used only in dire circumstances. In this movie magic is reduced to the level of a bad dungeons and dragons game. I halfway expected The wizard (Mako) to pull out some eight-sided dice and roll them in his battle with the Man Ape/Toth-Amon. In the original movie, Conan ponders The riddle of steel? In this movie, Conan rescues a blonde girl and is betrayed by the evil stepmother. I didn't realize Snow White was Cimmerian. At least she wasn't surrounded by seven dwarves. Finally, Conan movies should be R rated. The world of Conan is violent, brutal, lusty and grim. This watered-down milquetoast version was designed to pander to a family friendly audience and D&D geeks. John Milius should have been in charge of this movie. It would have been SO much better. If you like the Conan stories, ignore this film.
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