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DVD Piranha
Roger Corman produced this shameless Jaws rip-off at the height of the "nature gone wild" boom of American cinema and struck B-movie gold. Scripted by John Sayles and directed by Joe Dante, this tongue-in-cheek thriller stars Bradford Dillman (doing his best Rip Torn impression) as an antisocial mountain man and Heather Menzies as a rookie detective who race a school of mutant piranha downriver. Dante and Sayles provide the requisite blood and gore for this drive-in meat market: a kids' summer camp and a waterfront amusement park await the little beasties. Along the way, riverside retiree Keenan Wynn gets his ankles stripped clean, camp counselor Paul Bartel is chomped on the cheek by a hungry little bugger who takes to the air, and hordes of unlucky bathers are caught in the center of a feeding frenzy. What differentiates this little gem from the legion of similar knockoffs are the satirical swipes at military arrogance and crass commercialism, Dante's energetic enthusiasm, and the bursts of black humor: "Lost River Lake: Terror, horror, death. Film at 11." The culty cast also includes Invasion of the Body Snatchers's Kevin McCarthy as the hysterical scientist guarding the creatures, horror diva Barbara Steele as a devious government researcher, and longtime Corman regular Dick Miller as an unscrupulous entrepreneur ("Sir, the piranha are eating the guests").
The DVD features good-humored commentary by director Joe Dante and producer Jon Davison, who also narrate the 10 minutes of good-quality home-movie footage shot by Davison. There are also six minutes of outtakes. --Sean Axmaker
I actually thought this was a Virgel Ward documentary about bluegill fishing, damn was I right. These fish look so playfull, I would have jumped in and chased them with my huge mouth of teeth. Heck, spinner bait or better yet, drain the river, these plastic toys wanted to die, play the scene when the kids get attacked backwards in slowmo, you can hear the fish say "are we getting a deal with Mattel or Hasbro, cause we don't have a chance as singing fish on a plaque, they look too real."
Get out of the water!
Where would we be without the venerable Roger Corman? Lovers of B-movie madness would likely have a lot more time on their hands to read books, interact with family, or take part in generally otherwise fulfilling life experiences had old Rog chosen a different career path. Fortunately, or unfortunately as the case may be, Corman sat out in Hollywood for three or four decades making low budget exploitation films. He also tried to cash in on every movie fad in modern cinema. And I do mean EVERY fad. You see, Roger had a dream to take an idea and make a profitable picture out of it that would entertain the masses. The problem was that someone else invariably had the idea first. Thus Lucas's "Star Wars" allowed Corman to unleash "Battle Beyond the Stars" on an unsuspecting public. Car chase movies saw Roger replying with "Grand Theft Auto" and "Eat My Dust." I could go on and on. There wasn't anything Corman couldn't do with someone else's idea. Perhaps the best example is "Piranha," a 1978 ripoff of Spielberg's "Jaws." This film made our man a lot of money, which allowed him to make even more spectacular ripoffs for years to come.
The flick starts with a couple of kids breaking into some sort of rundown fish hatchery for an evening swim. Something in the water kills them. End of movie. Seriously, something rather nasty does do away with the two idiots. We then see an insurance investigator by the name of Maggie McKeown (Heather Menzies on loan from Julie Andrews) heading out to discover what happened to these two dolts. She rather quickly hooks up with an embittered alcoholic with a penchant for flannel named Paul Grogan (Bradford Dillman channeling Grizzly Adams) who lives in a cabin down by the river. Somehow or other Maggie convinces Paul to head over to the fish hatchery with her. Sure enough they discover that something sinister has been going on there under the aegis of Dr. Robert Hoak (Kevin McCarthy). How do we know this? Because there's lots of nasty looking scientific stuff lying around all over the place. Anyway, Hoak eventually lets our two heroes in on a little secret: the government paid him a bunch of money to create a breed of piranha as part of some weapons program. Personally, I'm for anything that keeps communists out of our swimming pools, lakes, and rivers.
While all this nonsense goes on we know the piranha have escaped from the hatchery (thanks Maggie and Paul!) and are preparing a full-scale assault on the human race. A few locals fall prey first, but the real threat is the summer camp and an aquatic park downriver. Just to ratchet up the emotional element of the film a bit, we also learn that Paul's daughter is currently attending the camp. Oh dear! It's a race against time as Paul and Maggie set out with the twitchy Dr. Hoak in tow to stop the madness. As for the folks at the camp and the park, they haven't a clue as to what's about to happen. The only concern at the camp is the fascistic machinations of Mr. Dumont (Paul Bartel), a guy who takes great joy in ordering kids into the water and snooping on the foxy female counselors. At the water park, the owner plans on making a bundle on opening day and couldn't care less if a battleship full of exposed nuclear waste sailed into harbor. You can pretty much guess what happens in the last part of the film. Screaming, blood in the water, and a lot of out of shape Americans in unflattering bathing suits thrashing around on the beach in agonies. Fun!
I don't know whether to laugh or cry with this one, folks. Lots of people adore this film, and I probably would to if I'd seen it as a wee lad. I didn't, and I'm not that impressed. The swarms of piranha zipping through the water look so like the pieces of plastic they are that it's tough not to snicker. It's even worse when we see them up close chattering away on an exposed leg or belly. We're definitely looking at cheesefest central on a buck and a half budget here. At the same time, I did find a lot to like about the film. Seeing veteran horror babe Barbara Steele popping up from time to time as a government scientist named Dr. Mengers was a nice surprise, although she's largely wasted in the role. Kevin McCarthy plays frazzled well, and the script requires him to morph into a sniveling wimp for most of his screen time. Heck, we even see Richard Deacon (Mel from "The Dick Van Dyke Show") in a small role as Maggie's boss. Can't beat that. The talent behind the camera is moderately impressive too considering the budget. Joe Dante directed this flick, and John Sayles wrote the script. Both men went on to greater success, Dante with "Gremlins" and Sayles with "Eight Men Out," "The Howling," and several other mainstream movies.
Extras on the disc include a commentary track, extra footage, bloopers, and a few other odds and ends. Corman apparently took this film, or at least a similar concept, to television in the mid-1990s. If so, I haven't seen that version and thus cannot make a comparison. If the remake, or retread, or whatever it is looks and sounds like this movie, more laughs await us. Corman continues to churn out pap at an alarming rate, and has even recently inked a deal with Disney that will release his entire catalogue on DVD and keep it in circulation until the sun burns out. I've dogged on Corman quite a bit, but I do appreciate his films. If nothing else they are entertaining, and this one definitely works most of the time.
"Fish genetics is a small field."
This classic horror film was shot in San Marcos, Texas at and surrounding the Aquarena Springs resort. The DVD contains much footage of the resort and other things pertaining to it. Barbara Steele is great as the 'mad scientist' and she would have been great in the sequel, but oh well. There is one scene in which a tiny and bizarre looking creature is shown walking around which is quite interesting and could have been added to but alas, it is only shown once. The many schools of Piranha shown are actually Perch, a freshwater fish which thrives in the Texas river system, they resemble the Piranha(minus the scissor teeth.) The score is composed by Pino Donaggio.
"The greatest film about flying Piranha ever made". Well, Jim Cameron definetly called it right on this one. About as "guilty" as guilty pleasures get, this stubborn but very watchable "mother nature run amok" B-movie will probably best be known as the directorial debut of James Cameron who would later go on to make a couple of small unknown indie films called Terminator 2 and Titanic.
This name-only sequel to the Roger Corman cult classic has a rather silly premise involving a strand of mutated killer piranha with the ability to fly who are terrorizing an island resort. Of course, the resort's driving instructor (Tricia O'Neil) wants to close down the water activities but her boss isn't having it. Her estranged husband, the island's law enforcement (a young Lance Henriksen) is... More Info about this DVD Actor(s): Tricia O'Neil - Steve Marachuk - Lance Henriksen Director(s): James Cameron - Ovidio G. Assonitis DVD Release Date: Released the 28 January 2003 Usually ships within 24 hours
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Actually found out the grizzly was a costume worn by Bob Barker. He needed the money with the lawsuit from one of his beauties on the Price is Right. Bob does good when he blows up, thats what I think of his show..crap. More Info about this DVD Actor(s): Christopher George - Andrew Prine Director(s): William Girdler DVD Release Date: Released the 02 December 1998 Special Order
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Shatner and spiders. That's all the information I needed about director John "Bud" Cardos's 1977 film "Kingdom of the Spiders" to know that I simply had to sit down and watch it. Yep, Shatner and spiders--killer spiders to boot. I used to blast these nature gone amok movies as rapidly as I watched them. Outside of "Jaws" and a few others, spending a couple of hours wading through one of these films meant a couple of hours of sheer agony. Watch "Shark Attack 3" if you don't believe me, or "Crocodile," "Death Swamp," or any of the other hundreds of killer animal films clogging the arteries of a video store shelf near you. But something funny happened after I watched the fiftieth film in which a crazed, giant reptile munched down on a batch of teenagers: I began to really like these films... More Info about this DVD Actor(s): William Shatner - Tiffany Bolling Director(s): John 'Bud' Cardos DVD Release Date: Released the 16 September 2003 Usually ships in 24 hours
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The peculiar genius of schlock-king Roger Corman is in full bloom with this extremely gory, pointedly offensive homage to 1950s monster movies (with a generous helping of Alien thrown in for good measure), in which a legion of mutated salmon-men terrorize a small town in their search for unwilling female companionship. (Potential viewers should be warned that this movie goes to great lengths to show what earlier films in this genre had only implied.) A guilty pleasure for exploitation fans with a strong stomach and a twisted sense of humor. For what it's worth, director Barbara Peters has claimed that additional shock scenes were inserted by producer Corman without her knowledge. The glop-intensive special effects were devised by Rob Bottin, who later went on to gross out the masses with... More Info about this DVD Director(s): Barbara Peters (II) - Jimmy T. Murakami DVD Release Date: Released the 28 August 2001 This item is currently not available.
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I am a very patient movie watcher. I let the credits linger and I panic if some body trys to talk to me right after a really great movie has ended, because how am I supposed to know what I think of it if I'm still soaking it in? Squirm has pretty much nothing to soak in. It's a talkie. It's all talk, really, and it is so slow-moving. It's just a terrible waste of time, and I waited for it to get better and it never did. By the end I couldn't get my self to watch the extra features on this disc, because I just really wasn't interested. More Info about this DVD Director(s): Jeff Lieberman DVD Release Date: Released the 26 August 2003 Usually ships within 24 hours
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